Reasons the 90's Almost Killed Comics (Part 2)

Last week we looked at the first of my list of why the 90's are the "Dark Ages" of comics. Here we go with some more:

1. Feral Wolverine

I have to admit that stealing the adamantium from Wolverine by having Magneto rip it from his bones was a pretty cool idea. I give them points for being daring as far as that goes. And letting him have bone claws was pretty cool as well because that meant his claws were actually a part of his mutant abilities and it was a shocker to see them pop out.

And then Marvel got greedy.

For some strange reason the Marvel writers decided to take things to the extreme by having him slowly turn into an animal. The decision to make him an actual wolverine that had mutated apparently raised its ugly head again and they brought him down. He eventually went to wearing a bandana and even a ninja mask before it was all said and done.

2. Jackets and Pouches Everywhere

I can appreciate how comics try to stay relevant to the times with some changes. In the 90's, things went crazy. The X-Men were the epitome of crazy as far as costumes went.

I don't know if Xavier kept it freezing in the mansion or of they were just cold-natured, but for some reason jackets were in style. Gambit wore his well and it was cool. Everyone else just ripped him off.

Dazzler (a hero who shouldn't be in any comic) wore a jacket. Rogue wore a jacket. Jubilee wore a coat. Cyclops had more pouches than Batman's utility belt. But let's not leave out the Avengers, who loved their jackets too.

Black Knight wore one over his armor. Sersi wore one (sleeves pushed up, of course) over her costume. Crystal, the Wasp, Wonder Man, Firestar, Jusice and even Black Widow sported jackets during the 90's. I don't know why it became the norm for Marvel heroes, but they definitely weren't afraid to put them out there.

Eventually jackets phased out for a while and spandex made a return, but the damage had been done. At least Spider-Man never wore a jacket...unless you count the Scarlet Spider's hoodie.

And don't get me started on DC's Vibe. That costume just has no explanation. 

3. Bloodwynd

The 90's gave us a number of weird heroes, but we can't skip Bloodwynd. I'm the first to admit I wasn't a huge Justice League fan, but when I saw him show up in their confrontation with Doomsday (just before he killed Superman) my first thought was "When did Spawn join the JLA?" This character was an unabashed ripoff of Spawn and I have no idea how they avoided a massive lawsuit.

Just as quickly as he appeared, he was gone. I don't know that he's made any major impressions in the DC universe in over a decade. As a matter of fact, I doubt he made it through the recent reboot alive.

I have no idea if you should blame the writers for not knowing what to do with the guy, or the character itself, but Bloodwynd was a ripoff that stumbled out of the gate. But hey, at least he wasn't wearing a jacket.

4. Destroying Major Heroes...Then Bringing Them Back

The purpose of a reboot is to give us something new. Maybe sales are flagging on a title and they need to give the old horse a shot in the arm. Maybe new writers come in with new ideas. Or maybe a hero has just outlived their usefulness. For whatever reason, reboots are a hit-and-miss affair.

The 90's were brutal to the major heroes. Last week I talked about how Marvel tried to replace Spider-Man, but DC went ape-crazy in the 90's with wiping out their crew...though most of those deaths were short-lived.

So what did they do in the 90's? Well, they killed Superman (for a few issues). They broke Batman's back and replaced him with Azrael, who eventually went crazy and had to be put down by a healed-up Bruce Wayne. They turned Green Lantern into a crazed homicidal maniac who killed Sinestro with his bare hands...along with several members of the Green Lantern Corps. Then eventually he became Parallax, died saving the universe, became the Spectre, and then came back as Green Lantern again.

Many publishers would stop there, but they didn't. They had Aquaman lose his hand to piranhas and decide getting a harpoon/hook thing in there was a bright idea. They also gave him a new long hair and beard look that was supposed to make him "edgy". He stayed like this for a while, then they gave him a magic "water hand".

They killed Green Arrow with a bomb, until Parallax brought him back just before he died himself. They killed Hawkman and brought him back again thanks to his reincarnation powers. They didn't kill Martian Manhunter, who didn't deserve the pass but they made up for it big time by killing him off in the mid-2000's.

And hey, Marvel had their fun too. Besides replacing (and then bringing back) Spider-Man, they went brutal on their guys. Wolverine lost his adamantium through having it ripped from his very pores. The Fantastic Four and the Avengers were thrown to a new universe for a 12 issue "Reborn" reboot. They destroyed the Avengers again and gave us such classic "extreme" teams as "Force Works" (remember them?). Then Marvel had an "extreme fest" by giving us so many X-Men titles to follow that it was impossible to understand where any hero was supposed to be at any time. X-Treme, X-Men, X-Factor, X-Force, X-Man, and so many other titles brought to you by the letter "X".

The thing that annoyed me about it in the 90's was how short-lived it all was for the most part. In some cases it lasted for a couple of years, while in others the changes were mere months before you could see things reverting back (Superman was foreshadowed as back in the game almost immediately). On the other hand, it was a good thing those changes were short. Most of them were horrible choices.

Reasons the 90's Almost Killed Comics

While the 70's and 80's may have really helped comics, it was the 90's that almost killed them. Many people call the 90's the "Dark Ages" of comics, and it's easy to see why. Here are a few reasons:

1. Heroes Reborn

While DC got all the press for their recent reboot, Marvel tried it in the 90's with horrible results. The Avengers and the Fantastic Four were sent to another dimension, and we were treated to 12 issues of "meh" at best storytelling.

Marvel farmed out the work on their major titles to Jim Lee, Rob Liefeld and others at Image Comics. It was a "daring" move that they hoped would generate sales. Instead, the 12 issues we have of this storyline through various titles were met with confusion and ridicule in many instances. I mean, when Captain America is stacked more than Power Girl, you should see problems coming.

While they did manage to bring the team back to the "real world" later, they can never fail to admit the idea stunk. The concept might have been good, but their execution left a lot to be desired. You can get the trade paperback editions of their storylines now if you need a good laugh.

2. The X-Men Get a New Title...and a Million Copies of It

Any avid fan of The Uncanny X-Men from the 80's still had some hope as the 90's rolled in. Jim Lee was the top artist out there, and when we were told he'd be taking over a new X-Men title we were thrilled. You were hard-pressed to find a comic book fan who wasn't scrambling to find that coveted first issue of X-Men when it came out, certain we were holding a million-dollar collectible in our hands! What we didn't know was that Marvel was anticipating a sell-out, so they were feverishly printing and reprinting copies of this book.

At first we were proud and excited to say we owned that first issue that was sure to go up in value. Then we noticed comic shops and bookstores were still selling it. Then they couldn't give copies away. Now what could have stood as a landmark collector's item is notorious for being one of the least valuable back issues of the X-Men franchise.

3. Weird Cover Stuff

The 90's were a decade of dazzle for comic book covers. Never mind paper covers...no, the publishers decided what we needed were gimmicks!

We had foil-embossed covers! We had hologram covers! We had more variant covers than you could shake a stick at! We had lenticular covers! We had polybags with and without collectibles!

Some comics came bagged with trading cards! Some covers actually glowed in the dark! A few were die-cut to get them that extra edge! We had gatefold covers that spread out for miles (it seemed)!

Of course, many of the more spectacular cover enhancements meant that the comic itself would cost a little extra that month to cover it. At the time, it may have seemed like a spectacularly cool gimmick to begin with, but soon everybody was on the bandwagon and some months it was hard to find a comic that wasn't decked out in some gaudy cry for attention.

Now this is considered a joke of the comic book industry. Whoever was selling holograms to the comic companies in the 90's retired a very rich man.

I have to admit I was right there grabbing holographic copies of Spider-Man comics thinking I was having something special to give to my sons one day. Now they are stuffed in a box somewhere in the attic collecting dust with my copy of X-Men #1. Still, if you were willing to destroy the comic itself to get the hologram off you had a cool collectible sticker.

4. The Clone Saga

Oh baby, if you want to look at a low point in the 90's, look no further than this "turning point" in the life of Peter Parker. This confusing mess of storytelling reigned supreme as the worst Spider-Man storyline of all time until "One More Day" came out ten years later.

What's so sad is that the original story this is based on from the 70's was actually a pretty good story. The Jackal (Professor Warren) created a clone of Gwen Stacy and later Spider-Man himself. Spidey had to fight the clone and disposed of his body later. The story left just a little ambiguity as to whether our Spidey was the real thing or the clone.

Well, the Marvel writers in the 90's decided to turn things on their ear and say that our Spidey was actually the clone, and the real Peter Parker had been living another life since that incident. Even another clone named Kaine was eventually brought into the story and we were given quite the ride for a while. Peter Parker left with a pregnant Mary Jane to live a hero-less life while Ben Reilly stepped in with a new suit and took over as Spider-Man.

Looking back on this, it's easy to see where this could have indeed been a killer project for Marvel. It really did give them a chance to partially reboot Spider-Man while keeping the long-time fans happy by not erasing years of comic reading. Instead, the concept became so convoluted that even the writers themselves were unsure as to where it was going and who particular heroes and villains were. Aunt May was killed off (something I say should have been left alone) but she was subsequently brought back by saying it wasn't really her that died. Gwen Stacy's clone ran away and we never ever saw her again in any storyline. So many possibilities that were tossed aside.

Because of sales, the storyline continued on for far longer than it ever should have. If three clones were selling, why not add hundreds more and create "Maximum Clonage"? Let's bring back dead guys like Kaine and drag this sucker on for another year! Eventually Peter and Ben had to team up to find out who really was the clone, and we ended up with a reveal that Ben was the clone and Peter was real...or was he?

The only really cool thing to come out of the 90's Clone Saga was Ben Reilly's Spider-Man costume. I'm sorry, but whoever designed that one really nailed it as an incredible update to the suit while still paying homage to the original. I wish they'd still left that one around. It did come out in an action figure though, so it's better than nothing.

As I mentioned before, this was the potential for a reboot that could have worked, but they didn't have this mapped out well enough before they started and it soon became a write-as-we-go-along scenario that was doomed. Marvel had no lower Spider-Man point until they came out with "One More Day".

Two years ago they put out a miniseries by some of the original writers who were allowed to redo the saga in six issues with no interference from higher-ups like last time. In those six issues, they managed to put together a good story that would have made the saga (if they'd been allowed to do it right) one of the highlights of the 90's. Though the story feels rushed in some parts (there are several weeks that pass between most issues so the story can progress in a logical sense) it's still a lot better than the original.

Moments That Made the Bronze Age: Wolverine Begins

When we talk about shining moments of the Bronze Age of the 70's, there is one hero that we have to mention: Wolverine. His first sighting was an almost-unnoticed-at-the-time appearance in Hulk #181, a battle in which he fought the Wendigo and the Hulk, and lost when the Hulk sucker punched him.

He disappeared for a while until he was picked up in Giant-Sized X-Men #1. Ironically enough, the hero wasn't supposed to be a mutant, and his claws were actually just supposed to be attached to the gloves. That meant technically anyone could have become Wolverine later on. The guys are Marvel decided he'd make a good fit, turned him into a mutant, and threw him into the team.

Wolverine was a hit with the rest of the group, but unfortunately Thunderbird and he were both deemed too close to the same character and one had to go. Instead of just retiring the guy, they decided to kill Thunderbird in a toss-up decision that turned out to be the best one they could have made. Imagine how differently the next few years would have turned out if Wolverine had been the one they chose to kill off!

When John Byrne picked up the X-Men, he immediately focused on Wolverine as his favorite because they were both Canadian (true story) and he wanted a cool Canadian superhero. With Byrne's artwork, Wolverine became a superstar and helped propel the X-Men to one of the most popular comic titles of the 80's.

I can still vividly remember the first time I read X-Men #132 and saw that final panel where a soaked and beaten Wolverine finished the issue off with "Now it's my turn!" I couldn't wait for the next month!

When X-Men #133 came out, it did not disappoint. Wolverine was finally given the spotlight with his first solo cover! Inside he was basically the last free X-Man (the rest were captives of the Hellfire Club) and he tore through the faceless bad guys with some amazing action! There was no graphic scene of blood or guts like there would be today, but the story itself was so incredibly effective in every way. After the Dark Phoenix Saga ended, Wolverine got a new costume of brown and orange, and slowly the book focused more on him with the appearance of Alpha Flight, and even the return of the Wendigo.

If you missed out on this golden age of the X-Men, I highly encourage you to grab a copy of the "Essential X-Men" from that time. Even in black and white, Byrne's artwork and Chris Claremont's stories show you why everyone flocked to the title.

Today Wolverine is in just about every Marvel comic you pick up, either as a guest star, team member, or focal point, but back in the 70's and 80's all we had were these once-a-month appearances (imagine that: just one X-Men title a month!) to feed our Wolverine frenzy.

Then in 1982, Frank Miller gave us what we were hoping for: Wolverine's own title. Granted, it was just a four-issue miniseries, but it was wonderful. Having grown used to seeing Wolverine's sleek look from John Byrne's pencils, it took a bit to adjust to Miller's gritty style and his odd way of drawing Wolverine's claws like they were coming out of his fingers rather than the back of his hand. Still, it was Wolverine and he was solo, so I was a happy camper.

Eventually Wolverine moved to a regular solo title with Madripoor as the setting, and the rest is history. Unfortunately, the Marvel execs soon realized that every comic with Wolverine as a guest star sold a bunch, so they started dropping him into every comic out there. His first showdown with Captain America was cool...his "battle" with Power Pack was not. It was a hit-and-miss affair that eventually diluted the character to the point where it was actually more fun trying to find a title that went six months without an appearance by him.

Today he's in Wolverine, X-Force, X-Men, and a few other titles on a regular basis. They've stripped him of his adamantium claws, given them back, killed him off, brought him back, gave him a son and a female clone daughter, and the list goes on and on. But for me, I'll always remember him as the cool yellow-and-blue guy in the X-Men who really gave us something to look forward to each month. I guess in hindsight giving him his own title was the beginning of the end. Maybe he was just one of those awesome secondary characters who was best in smaller doses.

Moments That Made the Bronze Age: Days of Future Past

In many of these Bronze Age moments, the story is so powerful that I vividly remember where I was when I read it for the first time as a kid. In the case of this week's post, I was actually in a grocery store called Food World, patiently waiting for my mom to get her groceries while I poured over the spinner rack (remember those?).

The two-issue storyline "Days of Future Past" blew me away as a kid. I realize now that this story probably seems very anti-climatic because of how many times it's been referenced and revisited in various comic book stories. Looking at it for the first time with fresh eyes, however, it's a fairly impressive story for its day.

Basically, we get a glimpse of the future, as in 2013. Mutants and heroes are hated, hunted, and killed. A small band of heroes, including Wolverine, Colossus, Storm, Rachel Summers (our first introduction to her), Kitty Pryde, and Franklin Richards, try to stop this horrible future by sending Kitty's consciousness into her past self on Halloween 1980 to stop the assassination of Senator Kelly. His death paves the way for this horrible, mutant-hating world.

We get an introduction to the new Brotherhood of Evil Mutants (much later Freedom Force) led by Mystique. An epic battle ensues with the X-Men in our present, while in the future the X-Men remaining are killed one by one by Sentinels.

What made this story so special? I guess the thing that got me in the first issue was the dreary future that I was seeing portrayed. My heroes, the X-Men, were not heroes anymore. They were hated by the world. One image in that comic shows a line of headstones with various hero names on it. It was sobering stuff.

I could barely wait for the next month, and I was planted in my same spot reading the follow-up issue, which boldly proclaimed "This issue: Everybody Dies!". And there, on the cover, Wolverine is toasted by a Sentinel!

Again, I can appreciate how reading this today seems boring because, let's be honest, Wolverine has been toasted now probably a dozen times over the years. It seems like everyone who wants to kill him off in some variant or future-based storyline goes for the faithful "burn him alive" routine. However, this was the first time for me.

One by one, my beloved X-Men are killed off in the pages of this comic, even as their present selves fight to stop Kelly's assassination from taking place so the world will not turn out so badly.

In this end, this DOFP world was revisited a number of times in many different ways. The Fantastic Four were a major part in "Days of Future Present", where Franklin Richards came back from that timeline (before he was killed) and tried to recreate things. The four-part storyline was far inferior to the original though.

This storyline was even touched on briefly in the X-Men animated cartoon series of the 1990's, though their truncated version was different in many ways. That just shows how powerfully this particular two-issue venture resonates with the comic world.

Stupid Identities: Patch Logan

While there are some pretty cool secret identities floating around, there are times when comic book writers seem to stretch the boundaries of believability a bit. Case in point: Wolverine's stint as "Patch" in the beginnings of his first ongoing series.

During John Byrne's turn on the X-Men, he gave a lot of love to Wolverine (they were both Canadian) and soon created a breakout star. Any comic with him on the cover sold quickly, and then the time came to give Wolverine his own miniseries and eventually his own ongoing series.

Then the series came out and strange things began to happen. First, we lost the familiar costumed look everyone expected from the feral mutant tough guy. Instead of the mask and brown-and-tan or even yellow-and-blue spandex look, we were treated to a black number that made it appear Wolverine was doing some ballet work on the side. This was done because at the time the X-Men were presumed dead and this was a way to keep himself in action without giving away the fact that he was, in fact, Wolverine.

The claws were absolutely no indication of that whatsoever.

"Ignore the claws. I'm a normal guy."

Then we got a look at Wolverine's new secret identity: Patch. Looking at the character, it was fairly easy to see what Marvel was shooting for. Raiders of the Lost Ark was a pretty popular film and anyone looking like Indiana Jones was sure to be a hit. Take Marvel's most popular mutant and tie him in with one of the most popular action hero movie characters of the time and throw in a little Bogart from Casablanca...what could go wrong?

Wolverine was dropped into Madripoor, a locale created for the miniseries and the rest is history. Who would recognize this man now because he had such a convincing disguise?

But look at this and think about it. Who has perhaps the most immediately recognizable hairstyle in the comic book world? Do you see many other characters with this weird "hair everywhere" look (except maybe Beast)? Now throw in his liberal use of adamantium claws from time to time and you get this incredibly obvious "secret" identity.

Please keep in mind he was in Madripoor fighting guerillas and even the Silver Samurai, using nothing more than a fishnet for a mask and still no one figured out who he was.

The black costume died a quiet death eventually and Wolverine was back in his normal costume again, but the Patch identity has come back many times over the years to be used whenever a comic book writer saw fit.

Perhaps the most surprising thing is that this costume actually got a figure recently. It's in a two-pack set with Silver Samurai and reprints the second issue of the Wolverine comic book series. If you're a completist, you can add this to your collection of the 400 other previously-offered Wolverine figures.

Make fun of Clark Kent's glasses all you want, but at least he changed his hair style a little when he put them on. Imagine how ticked he'd be to find out all he needed to do was just throw on an eyepatch and the world would be none the wiser.

Heroic Hangouts!

Every hero needs a place to call "home"...even though it's not. Let's just say it's a really cool clubhouse and go from there. These bases would really make fun places to live!

The Fortress of Solitude

The commute for this one would be killer if you didn't have super-speed or flight on your side, but you have it admit it would be a pretty nice place to hang out. Now I'm not talking about the "ice castles" version you see in the movies and on Smallville...I'm talking about the one in the comic books. 

This thing had gigantic statues, a bottled city called Kandor, a full-sized cruise ship (just for decoration!), a private alien zoo, and so much more. Not to mention the fact that it virtually guaranteed no solicitors at your doorstep. They wouldn't even be able to find the place or lift the gigantic arrow key!

Of course, between all the world-saving and the Daily Planet day job, I don't see how Superman spent any time in the thing.

The Baxter Building

Home to the Fantastic Four since the beginning and almost constantly since, the Baxter Building is the antithesis of the Batcave: It's located right in the heart of the busiest city in the U.S. so everyone knows where it is! Add to that the fact that no one in the team has a secret identity and you get the feeling it was begging for visitors.

Filled to the brim with scientific do-dads and even the entrance to the Negative Zone, the Baxter Building packs a lot of function into a small amount of space.

It took several years and multiple battles before Reed Richards finally bought the place. Before that happened, it couldn't have been fun working in that building.

"What's that sound? Oh great, Doctor Doom's attacking the top floor again. Now I'll have to take the stairs to go home! 35 flights of stairs! I'm getting another job!"

The JLA Satellite

A base in outer space is another way to keep the unwanted visitors off your doorstep. Unfortunately, there are those of us who have crippling fears of heights which would immediately strike this off the list of potential heroic hangouts. 

This is definitely the most unsafe of the bases in this list, as any puncture to the hull would result in immediate and terrifying death for those who weren't built for outer space.

This base got a really bad rap during Identity Crisis, when Sue Dibny was assaulted by Doctor Light in it. To me that was something that could have been skipped over altogether.

The JLA no longer have this place, choosing instead to work out of the Hall of Justice. Those of us who grew up in the Bronze Age of comics still think of this place as the JLA's true home. Even the moon base they had for a while didn't seem as cool as your own satellite in space.

The Avengers Mansion

This one is cool because...well, it's a mansion. It's located in Manhattan (where all the cool heroes hang out) and has been the sight of several titanic battles over the years. Tony Stark originally paid for and built the thing for the Avengers back before they knew he was Iron Man and it's served them well over the years.

The mansion has been the site of several heart-wrenching battles. The "Avengers Disassembled" storyline saw the death of Ant-Man and Hawkeye there before it was destroyed. The Masters of Evil also came in the ripped the place to shreds at one point, almost killing Jarvis in the process.

The Avengers moved to their own floating island/building for a while. Big surprise here, but it was eventually sunk during an attack in the "Acts of Vengeance" storyline. Recently it was rebuilt by Stark and given to Luke Cage as a base for the "New Avengers" after the events of Civil War.

The Batcave

Hands down the coolest place to live on Earth, the Batcave won our reader's poll of best overall base and it's easy to see why. Besides being hidden in a cave (and what guy doesn't think that's cool?) it's filled with the latest gadgets and goodies...along with an awesome car, boat, and plane at your disposal at any moment!

Don't feel like being in the dark? Well, you get the best of both worlds here by just walking upstairs to stately Wayne Manor! Now it's nothing but fireplaces and flat-screen televisions in every room, along with your own butler! No more cleaning up after yourself!

Actually though, there's a possibility Batman could have been a bit of a hoarder with all that junk he kept in there (a giant penny and a mechanical dinosaur? Seriously?). Also, what's the point of having such a boss base and never letting anyone else see it? I'd have friends over all the time, which is probably why I'm not the Batman (or am I?).

Trailer Thursday: X-Men First Class

I can't say I'm thrilled about this film. It has pretty much flown under the radar and with Thor, Captain America, and Green Lantern all coming out this summer I definitely feel it's the weakest of the batch. I do have to say that there are moments in this trailer that strike me as interesting though:





Ok, Hank changing into the Beast is a pretty cool moment, along with Mystique coming in there (I didn't know she was included in the lineup). For the most part though, I'm not blown away by this. I'll probably go see it though simply because this is Marvel's attempt to get more X-Men movies out there and I know there has got to be better stories out there to tell in the future.

So what do you think? Will you be going to see an X-Men movie without Wolverine in it?

How to Fix Marvel Comics (Part 2)

Last week I gave you the first part of my master plan at world domination with Marvel Comics. This week, I give you the conclusion of the post with a few more suggestions Marvel could listen to that might help them win the market again.

4. Give us a good cartoon team-up series!

When I was growing up, Marvel had the best cartoons. Yes, you had the Super-Friends, but Spider-Man, Hulk, The Fantastic Four, Iron Man, and even Silver Surfer had time onscreen. While each series had their share of cool guest stars (and the infamous "Australian Wolverine" from Spider-Man and His Amazing Friends), you have to give it to DC Comics for putting out Justice League Unlimited. That short-lived series (one and a half seasons) gave second-tier guys like Hawk & Dove and The Question a full show, and gave fans a real treat along the way. Soon DC had released "The Brave and the Bold" and we saw episodes with Kamandi and Deadman getting a chance to shine! 

Yes, I know Superhero Squad is out there, but that doesn't count. That's just too far down the kid zone for me. There's a fine line that DC captured with "Batman: The Animated Series" and was able to translate into JLU.

And Marvel is developing the Avengers series, but it won't have a rotating roster like I'm talking about, though it's a step in the right direction. Given the Avengers history of former members, there's a lot of wiggle room there. Let's see some cool second-rate folks like Stingray, Union Jack, Sunfire and Havok in animated form!

5. Fix your flagship character!

What in the world has happened to the hero? Ok, I'll give it to Marvel that the Green Hulk/Red Hulk confrontation was an awesome series, and it's nice to see Steve Rogers back in action even though he's not slinging the shield (yet), but do something with Spider-Man!

Ok, I hated "Brand New Day" and everything since. I jumped back on board for "One Moment In Time" thinking I would get some sort of closure, rationalization, or fixing of the whole "Mephisto made it go away" stupidity from years ago. Instead, I got a story so lack-luster it made me think Grant Morrison was writing it.

What has Marvel done to him in recent years? Let's see, there was the whole "Gwen Stacey and Norman Osborn were lovers and had two kids" thing that defiled Peter's memory of Gwen (and ours) forever. Spider-Man dies and comes back as some rabid spider thing in "The Other". Peter sells his loving wife out to Mephisto in order to let his 212 year old Aunt May live again. We get one bright spot where Peter publicly unmasks (a real "WHOA!" moment) in Civil War, but then it all heads downhill from there.

And then, just when you think it couldn't get worse, we get "One More Day" and the whole "none of it ever happened and the last 20 years of comics you've read were just a dream" situation.

There have been very few times in my life when I've literally thrown a comic book down in disgust, but that was the last straw. All we need now is to find out Peter is addicted to crack and is having an affair with the neighbor's dog and we'll have a perfect Quesada storyline.

Give Peter a break, and do something right with the character. I'm not asking you to erase the erase you did (though that would be nice), but I'm saying give us back some essence of the character we've grown to love. My first comic was Spider-Man, and I followed each issue religiously for years. Now all I have are the "Essential Amazing Spider-Man" books to remind me of why I ever cared about the character.

And now we're going to have to live with another reboot on the character in the movies? Please tell me we're skipping the origin this time out though. My parents are both 60 and have never read comic books (though they indulged their son as a child), and they both know Peter Parker was bitten by a radioactive spider to get his powers! Let's face it: another origin story would be a complete waste of film! I can appreciate the need to reboot the franchise after the "disco Peter" episode of Spider-Man 3, but pick it up like "Superman Returns" and have some faith in your audience. Don't take us back to square one, please!

6. Lower the price!

My first comic book (pictured at the right) cost a quarter at the Majik Market down the road from my house in 1975. Today, that same comic would cost me four dollars! No more pages added, and no less advertisements in there...just an incredible price hike that makes collecting multiple titles a thing of the past.

Today, I wait for the trade paperbacks and buy them used on Amazon.com. I'm not always up-to-the-minute with stories, but I'm not shelling out $50 a week on stories either.

I know DC is talking about lowering their prices by $1 a book next year, and Marvel is tossing around the idea too. Marvel, don't toss around anything--just do it. I can appreciate the shiny paper the comics are printed on now is supposed to last longer than newsprint and gives much brighter colors, but let's do whatever it takes to bring the prices back down to a sane level. If that means we see cheaper paper, then so be it.

And finally...

7. Move Joe Quesada!

Look, I understand all he's done for the Marvel, and he's had a number of hits, but he was pulled from the Marvel Knights brand (an edgier version of Marvel comics at the time), and he's proceeded to drag the rest of the titles down the edgy, push-the-envelope style since his takeover.

I don't think you should fire him, just move him back to what he's good at. Let him have an edgy brand of Marvel and he can corrupt it as he sees fit. Let someone else fix the rest of it. Give Quesada five titles and leave him alone for a while. He can put Obama on the cover of 3 of them, then let Kevin Smith write a 4-issue mini-series that'll take 3 years to complete. That should keep him happy for a while.

The fact is that Quesada is a talented guy, but he lives in a bubble as far as what he considers entertainment. While folks do enjoy movies like "Saw", most of the world doesn't let that become the only thing they watch. Some of us do enjoy a hearty helping of "Batman Begins" and even "Toy Story" every once in a while. He needs to move beyond the "dark is goooooooood" phase now.

Next week, I present the epilogue of this rant: a quick overview of one storyline Marvel could use that would allow it to hit the heights and finally use one of their secondary characters as a heavy-hitter...with no explosive blood scenes but good entertainment!

That's my take on what could turn Marvel around, among other things. Agree, disagree? Comment away!

Comics Versus the Movies - Villains Edition Part 2

Last year I looked at how villains had fared in the movies compared to their relatively cool looks in the comics. It's time to update that list with several more who may or may not have been an improvement. Many thanks to Dorian, the reader who suggested many of these.

Two-Face

In the comic books, he's been portrayed over the years as a psycho, a hero, and a tragic figure. He's gone from silly to serious, and there were some great moments in his character's history. In the movies, it's been a toss-up as well. In Batman Forever, Tommy Lee Jones portrayed the character as a weird variation of the Joker. He had this weird purple face that was hard to take seriously, but in all honesty it was the least of the worries for the franchise at that point.

Aaron Eckhart turned around and made the character a tragic hero in The Dark Knight. While having the most gruesome face of all time, he showed us Harvey Dent before Two-Face, which made us sympathize with the character and hope for a good outcome. It didn't happen, but that just added to the gravity of the whole situation. Batman had to become a fugitive to protect Dent's pre-crazy reputation, and while we may never see a sequel to find out the repercussions of that decision, it was a strong move.

Kingpin

In the comics he is one huge, bald-headed white guy. In the Daredevil movie, he was one huge, bald-headed black guy. In the comic books it was hard to imagine him being fast enough to be a serious threat (especially if you've ever had to walk behind a fat guy in the mall). In the movie, we saw enough muscle in there to see what he was capable of.

The Daredevil movie wasn't that great, and I'm honestly not out there pushing for a sequel (a reboot, yes) but I wasn't really impressed with either villain in that film...or even the hero for that matter. Could have been worse though, I suppose.

Iron Monger

This character was radically different in many ways. In the Iron Man movie, he was old and worked for Tony Stark. In the comics he wasn't that old and had his own rival company taking on Stark Industries. Still, you have to admit the final armor in the movie was a nice challenge for Iron Man. He was one big dude.

The Riddler

The comic book version of this villain has been a pest, a private eye, and now a psycho again. He's a complex villain who may make some deep statements but always keeps himself presentable.

Jim Carrey, on the other hand, took the guy up about 18 notches and turned him into a really funny villain you had trouble seeing as a serious threat. He made the TV version of Riddler seem calm! To Jim's credit, however, he was the first Batman villain to actually make it through one of his movies alive. Unfortunately (or fortunately, I guess) we'll never see him in a sequel. I still think Michael Emerson would make a great Riddler for the next Batman movie.

Ra's Al Ghul

This one is hard to score. The comic book version is a tough guy with a lot of issues. He has a daughter madly in love with Batman (and even had his son). The movie version was the guy from "Taken", which remains one of my favorite movies of all time.

While I wasn't overly impressed with Liam's overall take of the character, it did make for a rather nice plot twist in the "Batman Begins" movie. I liked how he was Bruce's mentor before becoming his enemy.

Scarecrow

 This one was actually pretty good. Despite having a lot of leeway in this, they stayed fairly close to the character. The costume was exact, but they were close enough to see where it was coming from. Cillian Murphy did a good job of having that "trust me" look that turned into a "HA! GOTCHA!" moment later.

I wish he'd gotten more of the costume besides just the hood though. It sort of made him look like he'd done his costume shopping at the Thrift Store.

Mystique

Lots to complain about here and lots to love. On the one hand, they took this rather cool character from the comics and turned her into this weird freak for the movie. I can understand the need to make her seem more motivated to hate people, but it could have been done differently.

On the other hand, there was no need for her to have to constantly change clothes when she changed identities in the movie. That was an interesting touch, though it could have been overlooked or explained with a costume, I guess.

Lady Deathstrike

Another one that kept the essence of the character while changing the overall look (and origin), this one made for a pretty cool fight in the second X-Men movie. While the outcome was never in doubt, you have to admit it was kind of touch and go there for a while.

Personally, this is one time I'm glad they didn't go with the comic book costume. To me, it would have been a bad choice and almost impossible to pull off. It would have made the character seem far too comic book and not threatening. The way she was set up, the Wolverine fight in the end was two sleek adamantium warriors going at it.

Doomsday (Smallville)

While this isn't a movie character, I wanted to give him a mention. When we heard that Doomsday was coming to "Smallville", we knew it was going to be a hard thing for them to do. For one, we knew he wouldn't kill Clark like he did in the comic books, so the overall threat was gone. Second, we knew Lex was gone, so his origin would be in question. 

As far as appearance goes, they did their best to stay faithful to the comic character while still making it work for the series. I wasn't that impressed with the human turning into Doomsday rather than him being created as a monster from scratch, but in the end it made for a pretty cool episode.